Wednesday, March 16, 2016

For the Love of Home and Country: Caroline Harrison



I couldn't help thinking while reading Caroline Lavinia Scott Harrison by  Anne Chieko Moore that Joanna Gaines from Fixer Upper would have just loved her. I can picture them hanging out together busily motioning to this wall and that wall while their remodeling ideas tumbled out of their mouths quicker than they could scratch it onto the parchment plans.



Caroline Harrison, First Lady

 By the time Caroline reached the White House in 1889 she had already run a successful home with servants in the center of Indianapolis social life. She also had spent 1881-1887 as a Senator’s wife hosting others in Washington D.C.

The White House was badly in need of expansion. The Harrisons’ brought her father, their two grown children and their spouses, their grandkids, Caroline’s sister and niece with them to the White House. This large family shared five bedrooms and one bathroom which was part of a hallway containing offices! Caroline worked on an expansion plan to present to the Congress. The plans passed the Senate, but not the House since the speaker was not a big fan of Harrison. Instead they gave an appropriation of $52,000 to remodel and redecorate. So Caroline remodeled Chip and Joanna Gaines style!

She arranged for contractors to come and fix up the rotting wooden floors and put in a new kitchen. She also had a master bath put in. The rat population was so bad that she had to call in a man with ferrets to get rid of them all. In addition, Ben and Caroline Harrison were the ones who put the first electricity in the White House which cost $13,450 and was installed by the Edison Company.

Caroline also was the first First Lady to take charge of decluttering and inventory. Before it was the steward’s role to decide what stayed or went. She started with the eight room attic and found some amazing treasures like a thirteen and a half foot mirror-lake which was a gift from Paris to James Monroe. She also found a desk that was given to President Hayes which she had restored for Ben Harrison to use. Later, JFK used the desk.  She also began an inventory of what was actually in the White House so the house was kept in proper order.

When she reached the basement she found lots of presidential china from years past. She began to take inventory and came up with the idea to display the china.  This china collection remains on display today.

In the midst of all this cleaning out and remodeling, Caroline also kept up with the day to day household chores of the White House. Her daily schedule:

6:00 AM Marketing with Baby McKee, her grandson, in tow

8:00 AM Breakfast with the family followed by Bible Reading and prayer lead by Ben Harrison

10:00-2:00 Caroline and the other ladies of the house would give tours to visitors and also entertain those who called

1:30 PM Lunch

6:30 PM Dinner which often included unexpected guests

A reporter commented on the fact that Caroline did her own marketing. Her reply: “Why certainly; always. How else could I expect to have things done to please me?”

She also applied her love of home to her home nation beginning several patriotic traditions such as The Pledge of Alliance, flying the flag on all government and public buildings, and standing during the National Anthem. In addition, Caroline was the first President General of the Daughters of American Revolution and presided over meetings held in the White House.

She was criticized in the press for being too domestic and having nothing better to do. But in reality she thrived and excelled domestically at the same time as paving the way for other women to succeed in other roles. For example, she was part of a group of women asked to fund raise for John Hopkins University’s new medical school. But the women said they would not fund-raise unless the school promised to admit women on equal footing as men to the new medical school.

She also read the newspapers and talked with Ben on political matters. She was well informed and involved.

Caroline’s confidence and competency in her homemaking role from her home in Indianapolis to the White House is inspiring to women today who desire to be available to those around her and make her home and country her first love.



 (Note: this post contains an affiliate link. Read the disclosure policy here.)

Tuesday, October 6, 2015

9 Facts About Frank

The story of America's youngest First Lady was well told in Frank: The Story of Frances Folsom Cleveland by Annette B. Dunlap. When you read it, you will have to decide for yourself if you think she really loved her much older husband. 



Here are 9 facts about Frank:
  • Frances Folsom lost her father at the age of 10 and Cleveland was the administrator of her father’s estate. Cleveland and Folsom had been law partners and close friends. Cleveland even gave Frances her first baby carriage.

  • Frances was well-educated at private schools and was fluent in several languages. She graduated from Wells College. She later became a board member and held the position for 50 years.

  • At twenty-one she was married in a White House wedding to forty-eight year old Cleveland.

  • Cleveland worked a lot and fished and hunted and often left his young bride by her lonesome. Through both terms of office she insisted they have a carriage ride together each afternoon although she had to pry him away from his desk to do so.

  • The first term in office she was a young bride. The second term of office she was a mature woman and mother.

  • Ever have a Baby Ruth bar? It’s named after the Cleveland’s first child. They had five children together. Sadly, Ruth died as a child from diphtheria.


  • Frances was very active in the New York Kindergarten Association and brought the first kindergarten to the White House. Cleveland missed his chance to use this to his advantage politically. Frances also helped begin the organization that is now known as the Parent Teacher Association.

  • After the second term in the White House, the Cleveland family moved to Princeton, NJ. Frank loved entertaining “the boys,” especially those whose home was far from the school.

  • Grover Cleveland passed away in 1908.  Frank married again to Thomas Preston, Jr, a man closer to her own age. This marriage was full of mutual companionship. What a joy since she did not have that the first time around. Thomas even liked to knit and crochet with her! He also was intellectual like she was. He was an archaeology professor at Princeton. 




 (Note: this post contains an affiliate link. Read the disclosure policy here.)




Friday, July 17, 2015

Ellen Arthur: " A Woman Jane Austen Would Have Understood"

Having recently finished reading Dear Mr. Knightley in which the main character compares everyone she meets to characters from classic literature, mostly Jane Austen's work, it was fun to see this comparison brought out in a First Lady biography.







Ellen Arthur, who doesn't have her own biography, is described in Gentleman Boss: The Life of Chester Alan Arthur by Thomas Reeves, as "a woman Jane Austen would have understood." Why? Because her world revolved around her family and she was cheery and proper.




Ellen was the only child of a southern aristocrat, haughty and domineering mother and a father who was a sea Captain who had explored the entire Amazon river. When her father died at sea, Chester, who was an attorney and a close friend of Ellen's cousin, took care of the family's financial and legal affairs.



Ellen and Chester were married October 25, 1859 in New York City. Both Chester and Ellen had expensive tastes and Ellen was described as an elegant hostess. She must have been a charming guest too since an acquaintance remembered during her once a year visits how she smiled sweetly, talked kindly, and even remembered the servants names. She was socially aware of her obligations. If only she had lived to become First Lady she would have really thrived in this role!

During the Civil War, Chester had a brief military career for the North while Ellen "quietly but firmly" supported the south. 

Chester's routine was to stay up late with the guys smoking, drinking, talking politics, until 2:00-3:00 am, come home and go to bed, get up at 1:00 pm to go to work and begin this routine again.

All while Ellen is home tending the children.

Needless to say, there was tension in their marriage.

In 1880, after 20 years of marriage she caught pneumonia either from the exhaustion of having just returned from France to bring home her mother's remains, or from waiting out in the cold in January waiting for a carriage ride.

In Gentleman Boss, it says that Chester stayed at her bedside until she died. However, Carl Anthony says in Susan Swain's new book that he was away in Albany in business when she died. He was governor of New York at the time.



In either case, Ellen's death, at age 42, deeply grieved Chester. He regretted his treatment of her.  He never married again. 

When he was president, he donated a window to St. John's Episcopal Church in her memory and required that it be placed on the south side of the church which he could see from his private quarters at the White House.

This is the window, "to the glory of God and in memory of Ellen Lewis Herndon Arthur: Entrance into life January 12, 1880



Daily he had fresh flowers brought to the White House to be placed beside her photo.

It would have been fascinating to have Ellen as a first lady. She seemed born and bred for the role. 

And we can see from Chester's life to treasure our spouse while they are here. We may not always have them.

 (Note: this post contains affiliate links. Read the disclosure policy here.)

Sunday, February 15, 2015

Lucretia Garfield: Patience Pays Off


It is horrible to be a man. But the grinding misery of being a woman between the upper and nether millstone of household cares and training children is almost as bad. To be half civilized with some aspirations for enlightenment, and obliged to spend the largest part of the time the victim of young barbarians keeps one in a perpetual ferment.
– Lucretia Garfield to James Garfield, June 5, 1877


The above quote was the only thing I knew of Lucretia Garfield before I read Crete and James: Personal Letters of Lucretia and James Garfield edited by JohnShaw. I expected a bitter and complaining woman, but she really was not. She must have written this quote on a bad day!  She had plenty of opportunity in her life to be a bitter and complaining woman, but she choose patience and forgiveness which paid off to giving her a long happy life.




Lucretia Garfield was well educated in the classics and had been a college teacher of French, algebra, and Latin among other things before she married James. But after she married James and began to have children her time was spent in taking care of them and her household including James’ mother and some boarders from time to time. In their letters James and Lucretia reference a lot of classical literature that went way over my head.

The source of most of her need for patience and forgiveness was James himself. He had begun a correspondence with her and her letters were very affectionate and flowery. James and Lucretia talked of marriage, but in person Lucretia must not have been as affectionate. James ended up marrying her out of a sense of duty. What a way to start out! In their first 5 years of marriage, they only lived together for 20 weeks. Part of that time he fought in the Union army and part of that time he was campaigning but there was a lot of that time he was on trips for pleasure or to scope out some land for a friend. Or to visit a mistress. There were two affairs which Lucretia knew about that were mentioned in this book. In addition, there was a mutual friend with whom James spent a lot of time with on a particular visit home. Oh, at that mutual friend happened to be a boarder. Cormac O’Brien in Secret Lives of First Ladies alludes to more affairs. But Lucretia remains a steadfast spouse despite her lack of trust. A painful part of the correspondence to read was where Lucretia finally for the first time referred to herself as a trusting wife. This was after one affair had been discovered and broken off and just after the couple and been bonded together by experiencing the death of their 3 year old firstborn.  But what does James do right after this trusting comment?  While in Washington he begins another affair!


Lucretia finds out, James breaks it off, and Lucretia works again and forgiving and trusting.


At this point in the correspondence I am disgusted by James. How could he do that to his wife?


But the rest of their life is all uphill and by the end, I am amazed at their genuine love and respect for each other. The next jump start in their relationship is from a 4 month trip to Europe the two of them take together. Then James builds a home in Washington for the whole family and from then on they aren’t separated as much.


It’s interesting to read letters between a couple. It’s like being a fly on a wall eavesdropping in on a conversation. Although James makes a comment at one point wondering if anyone in the future would read their words to each other.


James Garfield is shot shortly after he is inaugurated as president in 1881 and suffers for a few months with Lucretia by his side before he dies.

Lucretia lives many more years until she passes away in 1918. Since this was a book of letters between them, the book ends in 1881, but according to firstladies.org Lucretia remains very active in her intellectual pursuits like literary circles and even designing and engineering things for her home in Ohio and her home in Pasadena, CA.


It would have been very easy for Lucretia to emotionally check out of her marriage. But she didn’t. She patiently stayed committed and chose to forgive and move forward. This paid off as she spent many years in a genuinely warm and loving marriage which was both emotionally fulfilling and intellectually stimulating.

 (Note: this post contains affiliate links. Read the disclosure policy here.)


Wednesday, October 1, 2014

Lucy Hayes: Setting the Stage for the Change from Ball Gown to Business Suit


 

If you asked someone today what a first lady does, they would probably mention a lady who tries to better America by picking a non-partisan social issue and being a spokesperson on that issue (think Just Say No with Nancy Reagan or childhood obesity with Michele Obama.) So far in my first lady readings, though, their role has been as hostess of receptions and parties at the White House. At what point and with which lady is that transition made from ball gown to business suit?



Lacy Hayes is certainly not that first lady, but through her first lady experience I can see that the stage is being set in the American public for a first lady with a platform. Lucy Hayes was a religious woman and she and Rutherford agreed on a temperance policy for their own family and home. They kept that policy in the White House and choose not to serve alcohol in the White House. The American Temperance movement was SO excited! With Rutherford’s election they thought they would certainly now have a national spokeswoman and really make some progress with their push for prohibition. To their great disappointment and despite their constant pleading, Lucy refused to join or lead any temperance group. She felt that her decision should not be pushed onto others. But she would be faithful to her personal convictions.

 

The leadership position Lucy did accept was after her White House days.  She became National President of Women’s Home Missionary Society of Methodist Episcopal Church. This role fit Lucy since she was devoted to the church. And although she left most of the work to the vice-president and periodically tried to resign, she did give speeches in this role. In 1888, her last speech before her death, her speech concerned the southern Negros “still in chains to the ignorance and vice of generations of bondage,” the crime against women in Utah (polygamy of the Mormons), the increase of immigrants, and the hardship and poverty of preachers in the wilderness areas. The Missionary Society was effective. There were 40,000 members and supported 42 missionaries.

 

Lucy had always been a person who lived her convictions. Her biography, First Lady: The Life of Lucy Webb Hayes by Emily Apt Geer, actually included an incident from her childhood. As a young school girl there were some German immigrants in her school. At recess the other children would pick on them and were mean to them but Lucy took them away from the other children and taught them to cut paper dolls. How brave! Living out what was right even if it was not what others were doing.
Rutherford and Lucy Hayes wedding portrait
 

Rutherford and Lucy had a happy, close marriage. Rutherford’s love letters and diary entries are delightful! They had mutual friends and knew of each other when Lucy was a teen. Rutherford’s mother and sister bothered him about Lucy Webb and prodded him to get to know her. They spent some time together while Lucy was in college, but Rutherford was interested in someone else at the time. Then both Rutherford and Lucy were in a wedding party for mutual friends and that seemed to jump start their romance. Rutherford wrote great love letters and also delightful diary entries. For example: “I guess I am a great deal in love with- Her low sweet voice…her soft rich eyes…intellect she has, too- a quick spritely one, rather than a reflective profound one-by George I am in love with her!” Lucy did not write near as much as Rutherford did but when she did it was sweet like “I must confess Dear R you are more frequently in my thoughts than I ever imagined possible… If only you knew what a great man you are.”

 

She had five children who lived past toddlerhood. Three boys were young adults by 1876 when the Hayes’ came to the white house. The other 2, a girl and a boy, were elementary schoolers.

Her family was her priority and her life. It was a happy and supportive family.

 

Lucy had a couple of firsts. She was the first first lady to graduate from college. She was the first to have a telephone and running water in the White House. She was also the first FLOTUS (so far as I can tell from biographies) to have her babies delivered by a doctor. That doctor was her brother!

 

In June of 1889, Lucy passed away of a stroke while she was sitting in her rocking chair sewing in their home. She was 57.

 

In Lucy’s life time I see that at least some of the American public is asking for the First Lady to have a platform or political project of her own. Although she did not do so as First Lady, she did have a leadership role in an organization after the White House. So I see the role of First Lady one step further away from the ball gown and towards the business suit approach to the modern first lady.

 

 

p.s. I bought my copy of the biography on betterworldbooks.com, a used copy. It was an ex-library book, but it was signed by the author and there was a newspaper photo taped to the back page of when the author came to this library and presented her new book to the library and gave a speech on Lucy Hayes. What a great used book find!

 

 

Monday, May 5, 2014

The Many Adventures of Julia Grant

  One of the funny things about reading through the first ladies in chronological order is the overlap of history that I get to read. Because each biography contains the person's whole life I read the same time period in history over and over again. This is the seventh time I have read through the Civil War, and I will read through it again a couple more times. However, Varina Davis and Julia Grant's life are the pinnacle of the Civil War. Both ladies led action-packed lives but Julia Grant's life was much happier mostly due to a marriage of two people in partnership which is something Varina Davis longed for but never got. Julia Grant was also able to bear up under criticism which again may partially be due to her partnership in marriage but also because Julia had had so much practice dealing with criticism. Julia was also always ready for the next adventure.  I would have loved to have been a fly on the wall and hear what these two ladies talked about when they befriended each other later in their lives when they were widows living in New York.  I like to picture Varina saying "Oh, Julia, you are so blessed to have had such a loving, attentive husband. That is what I longed for but it was not to be."



When Ulysses' Grant first came around Julia's family's place it was to visit her brother, a West Point classmate. Ulysses was scrawny and according the Julia's father wouldn't amount to anything. However, Julia and her mother saw something special in him. They thought he would become a great man. Julia's father would not be persuaded and he left the two young people hanging for years before he would give consent to be married. Julia was apparently her father's favorite and she knew how to deal with his critical tongue and how to whittle him down to get what she wanted. Dealing with criticism is something she had to deal with her whole life and I believe this early practice was beneficial to her in preparing her for the public. After Ulysses had been gone fighting for many years away from his wife he just couldn't stand being apart anymore.He retired from military service and farmed including clearing his land and hauling the wood to town to sell. Many men looked down on the Grants at their farming and place in life. They were very poor, but very happy! Again, they pressed on against criticism for what they wanted. When Ulysses rejoined the military, and worked his way up to General there was even more criticism this time in the public realm in the media. His time in the White House is of course surrounded by critics. Even after Ulysses' death Julia continued to fight criticism. For example, Dr. Douglas who nursed Ulysses in his last months later ended up in a charity hospital. There was lots of media criticism of Julia. How could she let this dear doctor go to a charity hospital? Why didn't she pay for his care? (Side note: There was a brief mention of Dr. Douglas's wife setting up a boarding house in Bethlehem, PA, which is close to my home. I've got the South Bethlehem Historical Society on the case tracking down the house.)

Although the criticism effected Julia and she paid attention to what her family, her neighbors, and later the media were saying, the criticism never paralyzed her or utterly defeated her like it did to some other first ladies. This may be due to the fact that she was used to it. And she and Ulysses supported each other. They seemed like they were best friends who confided in each other and supported each other. That kind of support and intimacy in your marriage can outweigh the naysayers outside your home.

Julia Grant

The other thing that struck me about Julia Grant was her love of adventure! When she and Ulysses were first courting they loved to ride horses together through the woods of her family's property. They even happened upon an injured slave on one of their rides and jumped right into the role of first responder caring for the slave and even visiting him later to see that he was healing well. When Ulysses' fought in the Civil War, Julia stayed with him in the army camps as much as she could. 

Most adventurous of all was the Grant's world tour after their two terms in the White House. Other presidents had certainly visited Europe before, but this was much more. After Europe they visited Egypt, Middle East, India, China, Japan, and were thinking about visiting Australia but decided against it and went to California slowly making their way back east. They were gone for two years and were treated like royalty with big parties and receptions wherever they went. The American press closely followed their trip. No one had done anything quite like this before and they loved it all! Julia had a love for new experiences and adventure which I admire. Again, her happy marriage made this adventure possible and pleasant. If you didn't enjoy the company of your spouse there is no way you would want to travel around the world for two years limited to only his company.


The biography I read of Julia was The General's Wife by Ishbel Ross. The book accurately told the story of their lives but lacked historical reflection on Julia's significance as a First Lady. As the title suggests, the author mostly concentrated on Julia as a military wife, although even that lacked historical reflection. The most compelling biographies  give a complete look at the whole person, flaws and all. This book simply told the story. 


Saturday, January 25, 2014

First Lady of the Confederacy; Varina Davis's Civil War by Joan Cashin

I don't have a car horn that plays "Dixie" and I don't hang a confederate flag in my upstairs window as a curtain so why did I choose to read a biography of the First Lady of the Confederacy?


Varina Davis's name kept popping up in the biographies of the first ladies that I've read so far! The first time I read her name was in Julia Tyler's biography And Tyler, Too. Varina and Julia were in the same social circles in Richmond when it was the confederate capital. Varina called Julia "my beautiful step mother." (Tyler's grandson married Varina's younger sister.) Julia sent Varina gifts of shoes and clothing for her and her children while Jefferson Davis was imprisoned post-war. 

Jefferson Davis had married Zachary Taylor's daughter but after only three months of marriage Sarah Knox Taylor Davis died. Years later, when the Taylor's were in the White House, Senator Jefferson Davis and Varina were in Washington DC, and were very close with the family including the reclusive Margaret Taylor. Varina was even at President Taylor's bedside when he died in office.

Joan Cashin in First Lady of the Confederacy: Varina Davis's Civil War also noted that Varina had a relationship with Jane Pierce. And later in life as a widow and living in New York, Varina struck up a friendship with the widowed Julia Grant. 

Before reading her biography I assumed Varina would have been enthusiastic about the confederacy and her husband's work and cause. But now I see Varina as a dutiful, loyal wife who publicly embodied the quote from another civil war era woman "my husband is my country." 

Varina married Jefferson Davis while she was young and became a plantation mistress. She felt lonely in her home at Natchez, Mississippi and Jefferson was often gone on political trips. The happiest times in Varina's life was her time in Washington DC as a Senator's wife. Varina was well-educated, well-read, and a witty conversationalist. People from all parties enjoyed spending time with her. Since Jefferson Davis was more boss to Varina than companion, she relied on the women friends she made in this time in her life for the rest of her life regardless of whether they were Northern or Southern.

Varina had Northern roots. Her grandfather Howell was the first governor of New Jersey and she was schooled in Philadelphia. She remained close to her northern relations.

There are hints in her early letters that she did not agree with succession and thought it was a hopeless cause. There are other places in her letters where she supports the confederacy. But really, what choice did she have? It would not do to have the First Lady unsupportive of her husband and her country. What else could she do but put on her public duty face and press on?

Even if he wasn't the president, the husband Jefferson Davis would not had been easy to support. He did not consult her about anything in life like where they would live, children's schooling, etc. She just had to wait for his instructions and then follow them. As a second wife she lived in the shadow of his "perfect" first wife. Post-war Varina was in England with the children while Jefferson had gone back to the south to find work, something that was hard for him to do. In the meantime he began an adulterous affair and continued to put off bringing Varina back to the states! She could do nothing but wait for his instructions to come which he was not in a hurry to do. When this affair fizzled out on the woman's part, Jefferson decided to write his memoirs and did so while living in a rich widow's home while she acted as his personal secretary. Finally Jefferson brought Varina home...to live with him in the widow's house! How awkward! Yet through all of this Varina remained loyal to him. There is no hint she had any attachment or attraction to any other man. 

I read in a foreword to a Robert Frost book that to have an idea is different from entertaining an idea. Varina seems to have had ideas contrary to a woman's typical role in her time and place, but it didn't seem like she entertained or fully developed her ideas and beliefs. For example, as a plantation mistress she had written to someone that she thought it would be better to treat slaves with kindness. Wow! What if she would have entertained that idea? She might have ended up an abolitionist! But I can understand her predicament: what was the point if she could not act on her own ideas and thoughts but was limited to living out her husband's ideas and beliefs?

Varina as a widow writing for Joseph Pulitzer in New York

After Jefferson Davis died in 1889, Varina moved to New York. She supported herself by writing for Joseph Pulitzer, her friend. The rest of her days, Varina defended herself against angry confederates who were appalled that the First Lady was living in the North! She defended herself explaining that she needed to support herself and in New York was where the writing jobs were. 

In 1900, she was assigned to an article on Ulysses Grant. The article gave her opportunity to publicly declare that the south should not have succeeded and could have worked with the Union for state's rights. And that God in his wisdom allowed the North to win the war. Freed of her husband-country, towards the end of her life, Varina courageously, publicly declared her own ideas and thoughts! 

Varina remained in New York until her death in 1906.